Wednesday, September 7, 2011

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Robin Hood (73 of 79)

Posted: 06 Sep 2011 09:32 PM PDT

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73
—of —
79
Robin Hood
by J. Walker Mcspadden
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Chapter XXII: How King Richard Came to Sherwood Forest (Cont'd)

A handsome dark-haired page stood at Robin's right hand to pour his wine and that of the knightly guest; while the knight marveled much at all he saw, and said within himself:

"These men of Robin Hood's give him more obedience than my fellows give to me."

At the signal from Robin the dinner began. There was venison and fowl and fish and wheaten cake and ale and red wine in great plenty, and 'twas a goodly sight to see the smiles upon the hungry yeomen's faces.

First they listened to an unctuous grace from Friar Tuck, and then Robin lifted high a tankard of ale.

"Come, let us now begin," quoth he, "and every man shall have his can. In honor of our guest who comes with royal word, here's a health unto the King!"

The guest responded heartily to this toast, and round about the board it went, the men cheering noisily for King Richard!

After the feast was over, Robin turned to his guest and said, "Now you shall see what life we lead, so that you may report faithfully, for good or bad, unto the King."

So at a signal from him, the men rose up and smartly bent their bows for practice, while the knight was greatly astonished at the smallness of the their targets. A wand was set up, far down the glade, and thereon was balanced a garland of roses. Whosoever failed to speed his shaft through the garland, without knocking it off the wand, was to submit to a buffet from the hand of Friar Tuck.

"Ho, ho!" cried the knight, as his late traveling companion rose up and bared his brawny arm ready for service; "so you, my friend, are Friar Tuck!"

"I have not gainsaid it," replied Tuck growling at having betrayed himself. "But chastisement is a rule of the church, and I am seeking the good of these stray sheep."

The knight said no more, though his eyes twinkled; and the shooting began.

David of Doncaster shot first and landed safely through the rose garland. Then came Allan-a-Dale and Little John and Stutely and Scarlet and many of the rest, while the knight held his breath from very amazement. Each fellow shot truly through the garland, until Middle the tinker—not to be outdone—stepped up for a trial. But alas! while he made a fair shot for a townsman, the arrow never came within a hand-breath of the outer rim of the garland.

"Come hither, fellow," said Little John coaxingly. "The priest would bless thee with his open hand."

Then because Middle made a wry face, as though he had already received the buffet, and loitered in his steps, Arthur-a-Bland and Will Stutely seized him by the arms and stood him before the friar. Tuck's big arm flashed through the air—"whoof!" and stopped suddenly against the tinker's ear; while Middle himself went rolling over and over on the grass. He was stopped by a small bush, and up he sat, thrusting his head through it, rubbing his ear and blinking up at the sky as though the stars had fallen and struck him. The yeomen roared with merriment, and as for the knight, he laughed till the tears came out of his blue eyes and rolled down his face.

After Middle's mishap, others of the band seemed to lose their balance, and fared in the same fashion. The garland would topple over in a most impish way at every breath, although the arrows went through it. So Middle 'gan to feel better when he saw this one and that one tumbling on the sward.




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    Paranoia (073 of 170)

    Posted: 06 Sep 2011 09:30 PM PDT

    DailyLit  
    073
    —of —
    170
    Paranoia
    by Joseph Finder
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    COPYRIGHT
    Paranoia by Joseph Finder. Copyright 2004 by Joseph Finder.
    All Rights Reserved. Sharing not permitted.


    36

    I didn't have to break the news to anyone: the miracle of e-mail and instant messaging had already taken care of that for me. By the time I got back to my cube, the word was all over the department. Obviously Goddard was a man of immediate action.

    No sooner had I reached the men's room for a much-needed pee than Chad burst in and unzipped at the urinal next to me. "So, are the rumors true, dude?"

    I looked impatiently at the wall tile. I really needed to go. "Which rumors?"

    "I take it congratulations are in order."

    "Oh, that. No, congratulations would be premature. But thanks, anyway." I stared at the little automatic-flush thing that was attached to the American Standard urinal. I wondered who invented that, whether they got rich and their family made cute jokes about the family fortune being in the toilet. I wanted Chad to just leave already.

    "I underestimated you," he said, letting loose a powerful stream. Meanwhile my own internal Colorado River was threatening the Hoover Dam.

    "Oh, yeah?"

    "Oh, yeah. I knew you were good, but I didn't know how good. I didn't give you credit."

    "I'm lucky," I said. "Or maybe I just have a big mouth, and for some reason Goddard likes that."

    "No, I don't think so. You've got some kind of Vulcan mind-meld going with the old guy. You, like, know all the right buttons to push. I'll bet you two don't even need to talk. That's how good you are. I'm impressed, big guy. I don't know how you did it, but I'm seriously impressed."

    He zipped up, clapped me on the shoulder.

    "Let me in on the secret, will ya?" he said, but he didn't wait for a reply.

    When I got back to my cubicle, Noah Mordden was standing at my cubicle inspecting the books on top of the file cabinet. He was holding a gift-wrapped package, which looked like a book.

    "Cassidy," he said. "Our too-cool-for-school Widmerpool."

    "Excuse me?" Man, was the guy into cryptic references.

    "I want you to have this," he said.

    I thanked him and unwrapped the package. It was a book, an old one that smelled of mildew. Sun Tzu on The Art of War was stamped on the cloth front cover.

    "It's the 1910 Lionel Giles translation," he said. "The best, I think. Not a first edition, which is impossible to come by, but an early printing at least."

    I was touched. "When did you have time to buy this?"

    "Last week, online, actually. I didn't intend it to be a departure gift, but there you are. At least now you'll have no excuse."

    "Thank you," I said. "I'll read it."

    "Please do. I suspect you'll need it all the more. Recall the Japanese kotowaza, 'The nail that sticks up gets hammered down.' You're fortunate that you're being moved out of Nora's orbit, but there are great perils in rising too quickly in any organization. Hawks may soar, but chipmunks don't get sucked into jet engines."

    I nodded. "I'll keep that in mind," I said.

    "Ambition is a useful quality, but you must always cover your tracks," he said.

    He was definitely hinting at something—he had to have seen me coming out of Nora's office—and it scared the shit out of me. He was toying with me, sadistically, like a cat with a mouse.

    Nora summoned me to her office by e-mail, and I braced myself for a shitstorm. "Adam," she called out as I approached. "I just heard the news."

    She was smiling. "Sit down, sit down. I am so happy for you. And maybe I shouldn't reveal this, but I'm delighted that they took my enthusiasm about you seriously. Because, you know, they don't always listen."

    "I know."

    "But I assured them, if you do this, you won't be sorry. Adam's got the right stuff, I told them, he's going to go the extra mile. You've got my word on it. I know him."

    Yeah, I thought, you think you know me. You have no idea.

    "I could see you were concerned about relocating, so I made a few calls," she said. "I'm so happy things are turning out right for you."

    I didn't reply. I was too busy thinking about what Wyatt would say when he heard.




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